I must say that I still struggle with work on a daily basis with certain colleagues, but I'm always leaning on God's strength to make me a better nurse and person... Or probably I need to spread a positive culture to the people. I need to thank my mom for always helping me wash my uniform and cooking yummy food for me, so that I could excel in work hehe...
Presenting the other KKH nurses who go the award as well! Congrats!
Not forgetting, the lady who nominated me!! I guess in her own way, she is a good leader :) She knows what my talent and potential is, and allowed it to be maximised... I do miss those pre-forum days, where we worked so so hard in Ward 71's NM room hahaha. I can never thank her enough :)
I guess this award and even being a nurse means so so much to be because I was trying damn hard to hold back my tears while the speech by the Chief Nurse Officer was going on... She just merely mentioned the qualities of a nurse and that patients are at the heart of all we do. Indeed, I can really relate so so much with that. It really brings me great pleasure to serve my patients even though I have to do low class stuff like clean their shit/urine, get bad attitude from sucky support staffs and the list goes on... At least now I can't really say that I get irritating and rude patients cos they are all so lovable in 43 :)
Since I'm at this "passionate" topic, let me mention about my patient J who has been with the Lord about 2 months ago... I'm not sure why, but I've developed a strong relationship with her over the past few weeks she stayed with us. Probably because I got to know her in day therapy last year... More than that, I also got to build a good relation with one of her daughter, who was ever so willing learn stuff, just for her mom to be happy and comfortable. As I assisted with her terminal discharge, J's last wish was to go to Sentosa from the hospital for a staycation the family had booked beforehand. In my heart, I thought that it was so impossible as she required oxygen and always had to change diapers! As she left the ward, I could not help myself but broke into tears and I caressed J's face and hugged her. The crying was so bad that I made her daughter cry as well. We exchanged hugs as it was my way to comfort her and support her... Who knew.. J managed to stay alive for the 3D2N staycation and passed on peacefully and happily 2 days after she got home.
I didn't hear much from J until her daughter came by with chocolates and a hand-written card about 3 weeks after she passed on. I must say it was God's plan because she could have come by the way while I was on my vacation or not on shift. But I had the chance to see her and received closure! Her daughter shared with me the moments they spent in Sentosa with J for the last time and that she passed on peacefully. Then, she told me that her ashes were placed at the church near my house! What are the chances! Now, I can visit and say hello to her when I want to (I have yet to do it though hehe)! But I will do it soon! For now, I'm happy that J is in a happy place and I will fondly think of her!
I guess such stories keeps me going as a nurse. Being there for patients, or if possible, being there for their families. At the meantime, I'm still giving love to my patients in the ward :) Allow me to quote something I mentioned in the merit award booklet:
"I have never regretted becoming an oncology nurse. It is fulfilling as I get to accompany patients through their cancer journey. Holding their hands is my way of showing my patients that I am here for them and being with them at their last days is so special to me. Though I may not be their family member, I know I have made a difference in their lives :')"I guess when I'm so sick of management crap, I have this to look back to :) Thanking God for giving me the strength day by day :)