Elicia's Hens part & HK Trip!

Since I started school, my life had been quite settled down. But recently, I am starting to get busy @_@ Well, that's the life of Maria. Call me crazy, but I am so motivated to blog now when I have my exam in 2 days' time and my essay submission in a week *applause*

Anyway I wanted to blog about my super long weekend. It started with Friday :D Elicia's hens party was a staycation in South Beach Hotel!! Awesome and pretty place to stay! Location was perfect also!!! Both of us met up first to enjoy the facilities while waiting for the rest to knock off from work. Heehee.

When the rest came, we headed to Ikoi Restaurant. It was a little surprise for her! YUMMY! We were quite happy that the bride-to-be was craving for Japanese food!

Since I had Roy's Sony alpha 7 camera, we could stop taking photos!

Soon, we headed back to the hotel and played some drinking games. We were pratically high on Moscato. That was my favourite part of the night!! Hehehhee!

Having our games with drinks and desserts by our side. Best combi everrrrr.

So we stayed up till 3am. Went to sleep at 3.30am @_@ Woke up at 6.30am to catch my flight to Hong Kong! Woohoo!!! Hmmm, I shall allow the pictures to do the talking :)

Since Kenni is working there, he brought us around to eat really awesome food. OMG!!! The char siew there is the best I have ever tasted! Though, I don't have any photos of it heehee. Settled in a cafe in Central.

Me & Ter at Central Harbour. Lovely sun. But it was too hot to be cold :(

The boys looking to tall and cool!!

This is where our photoshoot series started. At Causeway Bay, Times Square :) Hong Kong is a place that never sleeps! The streets are always so bright! And cafes never close. I was walking around with Ter at 2am and the streets are still so crowded!

And since Judy was in HK as well, we could not help but to meet her for supper!! Hehehe (^_^)v

What's going to HK without taking a photo in their MTR station? Heehe.

Our last night was spend in Victoria Harbour. Our holiday ended too soon :(

This shot was taken with the Minolta lens. LOVE IT! Please ignore my tummy hehehe.

Our last dessert. Look at my happy smile when I sit in between these 2 lovely boys! Oh man, I miss Kenni's "If you eat this..." jokes :'(

This group photo sums up our trip!!

 Oh my. I had a good time. So, I BETTER BUCK UP ON MY WORK NOW! Okthanksbye.

Open the eyes of my heart Lord, I want to see You...

2016- A New Beginning

As the clock struck 12 on New Year's Eve, disappointment came upon me. Earlier this year, I had this strong sense of feeling that our relationship would go to a certain level. God even placed me in situations or used people to speak to me, that in 2015, something magical, all I've wanted these years will happen. Then again, I can probably think that all these is just a figment of my imagination.

I even laughed to myself, how ironic, that I spent the last few hours of 2015 near your house. All you could say to me that you were "not free". I was yearning to receive a New Year's message from you even. The last time we met, you didn't even bother to update me about your life, or even just sit by me, hoping that we could enjoy each other's company. I had it. I had enough of pursuing you.

In 2016, I decided to be stronger. I will no longer give in, or be swayed by your attitude or actions. No "episodes" of us will make me feel that there is still hope. It's time for me to move on. Seriously, I should really invest my time in people who will really love me genuinely. I hope to stop having you inside my dreams.

I must be strong. My life can still be awesome without you.

God.... Help me. I'm confused. Upset. Heartbroken... :(

Recalling 2015

2015 is coming to an end really soon! Gosh. Time really passes by so so quickly. Assuming that I will be living till 100, I have reached the quarter point of my life! Let's see what I have done so far which is worth remembering...

1) I passed my bike test on my first attempt and got my own bike!

And of course, I could not help but to take a cool chic photo of myself on the bike :P Rusty, I love you so much. Thank you for being with me, rain or shine (literally). He was always there for me, when I pillion the people I love, and the times when I cried non-stop. I hope that we will last long!~

2) Played my part for the cancer support group. 

I can't believe that I took charge of this whole event. I'm looking forward to the many amazing stuff that I am going to accomplish for the support group in 2016. Yay :) As much as these patients touched my life, I would wanna touch theirs :)

3) Got promoted to a Senior Staff Nurse. 

Could not feel the pinch, neither did I boast much about it. But let's just say that it is an accomplishment, that I have come THIS far in nursing? :) I held on and stayed strong! Many more years to come!

4) Sang for my advanced diploma graduation ceremony.

Something that I could be proud of :D Anyway, this is also an excuse to post a photo of me when I look relatively slimmer! OMG! WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING!

5) Was involved in a Musical :D

I really enjoy being in musicals/productions. Musical more actually heee. Cos I get to act, play a character and sing my heart out. Oh, not forgetting the chance to change into various costumes :) Ok, I am still waiting for a day when I get to sing a love song duet with a partner and fall in love on stage...

5) Started University.

Ok, but it's freaking me out now because I have submissions in a few weeks' time and I have totally no mood to do anything related to school How how how!!! :/ Alright, I'm gonna slap myself after this.

6) I actually looked this good/slim.

Photo effect or not, this is my motivation to slim down and exercise @_@

In 2016, I wish to...

1) Establish a Cancer Orientation Programme in partnership with the WCSG :)

2) Volunteer in Assisi Hospice: I was supposed to do it THIS YEAR but due to some circumstances, it will be in Feb. Maria you better START.

3) Adopt a healthy lifestyle and look slim & fit & chio.

4) Spend 2 months away from Singapore: Yup, that's definitely gonna happen.

5) Write songs and make music: Wow, it's been some time since I whipped out my guitar and made music.

6) Build up my dancing skills.

7) LOVE.

8) Have a bank account balance of $______

Alrighty. Wishing all a Happy New Year.

静静看着你

Ter recently did a cover of this song and I thought that it is so apt :( So, here'so my own interpretation of the song...

有一种旅行没有目的
(There is a kind of holiday with no destination)
有一种对话稍无声息
(There is a kind of conversation without a reply)
有一种等待不是等待
(You are waiting when there's nothing to wait for)
有一种曾经了无痕蹟
(We've gone through so much together, yet there were no memories)
有一种眼泪淌在心底
(There are tears at the bottom of my heart)
有一种痛楚就像呼吸
(There is pain everytime I breathe)
有一种守候仅是守候
(When I am by your side, I am really by your side)
有一种故事没有结局
(There is a story without an ending)

静静看着你
(Looking at your from afar)
隔着远远冷冷的空气
(In the midst of the distance and coldness between us)
静静看着你
(Looking at you from afar)
挂著轻轻浅浅的笑意
(I'm still hanging on with a smile)
兜著圈找不到那种距离
(The distance between us is too far apart that I can't see it)
不是你就是我那些刻意
(I'm confused on what's going on between us)
你手心的温度是犹豫
(I really don't know how you feel about me)

People have been helping me find more "friends", but my immediate response is to reject the invitation/offer. And I know the reason of such a reaction.

It's so funny, that after all these years, I can't seem to face reality or let you go. We have been creating so many memories of us together, but I know one day it will be destroyed like how a building collapses in an earthquake.

I've never been in a relationship, but I have loved and had heartaches before... The slightest thing makes me jealous and hurts me. It shows that you mean so much to me. I guess you can't exactly blame me for feeling this way.

When can I ever let you go?

Purpose

I guess I need to set my mind in the correct direction. After going through weeks of school, I realise that I'm not here to achieve good results (though, I hope I can). But more importantly is the process. Like learning stuff that I can apply next time at work, learn more about my working characteristics, and be happy in being youthful again.

Just hoping that I will have the opportunity to create radical changes and make the hospital a better place to receive treatment or to work in :)

At a blink of an eye, the year is coming to an end! It was almost a year ago where I went to Ward 71 for 2 months plus! Time really flies!! And very soon, I will graduate and hopefully get something worth recognising. So many expectations on me and I sincerely hope to do all these people proud. Never would I want to be known as the not-so-smart Maria. Or rather, I can don't be so smart, but I just wanna be genuine in the things I do and also be known as someone hardworking.

God is always my wisdom and my strength :)

:(

Last night, I heard from my colleagues that a patient passed on. Well, she's not just a normal patient. She's someone with recurrent cancer in the midst of her pregnancy. The cancer was so aggressive that she needed a cycle of chemo with the baby inside! 2 weeks ago, an induced labour was performed and her child was delivered at 27 weeks. I feel really sad and burdened for her. Well, the funny thing is, I've not met or nursed her before.

This just makes me miss my patients who had passed on :'( Like within a year, a couple of patients that I knew quite well had moved on to the other side. I don't know but I seem to enjoy the process of genuinely knowing them and caring for them in their last days. I do have regrets though, like certain things I didn't manage to do for them.

I would like to continue to share the love. So Maria, go sign up and volunteer in a hospice!

Palliative care... Is that my calling?